Posterous theme by Cory Watilo

Filed under: Me Personally

>Rainbow

>
i saw rainbow this noon after like a long long time not see it
wow! maybe it's let say a good omen for me?? hope so
well, i just saw half of it, the left end...
too bad i didn't capture it,
but it's not as bright as in the picture above, it's kinda blur
and thing that most differ from it is...
my happy, hope, impress and amaze feeling when i see it alive
thx God!!!

>It Makes My Day

>...->++ B ++<-... "There has never been, there never will be" says:
haha
yun
br bkin blog y?
ap c stella?
Yunita~유니타~ says:
iyaaa
g
...->++ B ++<-... "There has never been, there never will be" says:
owww trnya u toh
bgs2
mngikuti jjak g hehe
Yunita~유니타~ says:
iyaa
salah satu alasan g buat blog tu lu n stella
wakaa
tp g masi blm benerin lg
tar ajarin g ya buat blog kayak lu
g demen ma blog lu
i thought you have a talent as a blogger

...->++ B ++<-... "There has never been, there never will be" says:
hey listen yunita said i have talent as a blogger
do u think so?
Elvin says:
wkwkkwk you do, yeap
hm dont stop bloggginggg

p.s: wow! i couldn't ask for more than a friend like them both, thx!

>Angel With Broken Wings

>
Media_httpsabrinariaw_ilcop
disappointed, sad, tear apart, alone, pretending, and feel inferior that's what i feel recently
started from family issue to bad marks
it's like no matter how hard i try, i never be the best
it's like i don't deserve all the good things
it's like i'm being cursed by some invisible magic or spell
it's like i can't ever make anybody happy or proud of myself
it's like my life goes all the way wrong
it's like i attract trouble
not finish with one, the other one is coming

being the worst or worse it's definitely sucks!
it's not like i'm into obsession or i'm having pity on myself
but i just can't imagine how are my parent's mimic when they get my score report
surely it will break my heart
i just angry to myself
why didn't i work harder to achieve something more???
it's a rhetorical question, i guess
no one can answer it even me...

bad thoughts keep floating in my mind lately
like maybe i really don't belong in biotech
maybe i made wrong decision when i said "i want study biology in uni"
maybe my mum was right when she said i fit more in communication, hospitality or else that not so difficult to be studied.
maybe i was wrong when i rejected her suggestion
maybe better if i move to another department like psychology or other else
and so on...

and now i realized dearness in biology subject when i was in high school it's not enough to achieve something good here
well, it's not like i regret my decision or whatever
but being in this phase is really bringing me down
i feel like a crybaby
it's hard to pretend everything's okay but what else can i do???
all of these problem make me be pessimistic more about everything

i know it's not the end of the world
i know it's my turn to taste it all
but i need more faith...
and when i read my daily bread half an hour ago
i just kinda aware that i'm not alone, never
God never forget me through the easiest and hardest time
that's what i want to remember and cling on now
He is shaping me into a better person
hopefully after i finish deal with these issues,
i become a person that match with His desire

so yea, i need your support and prayer to going through this hard phase
thx for who already did, i really appreciate it all...

>Story Behind The Issue

>
yesterday family issue is still getting nowhere
feel like it's just wrong to live at home now
the normal condition would never be the same again, i guess...
my faith is tested, i mean it
keep praying to God, keep waiting the answer and the best solution from HIM
plus the mid term test bad mark keep coming to me, where are the good thing???

since i need kinda full of distraction from it
so i really appreciate my time in campus or else apart from my home
where i can run away from this issue even for hours only
laughing all the way with my friends, pretend nothing happen (psstt this is my expertise)
maybe that is the good thing, i don't know...

but i don't want this become public consumption, coz' i don't want them to feel pity on me
so i have to be careful for letting them know this thingy

well, i don't know
God sent me kind of "distraction friend"
here's the thing, my senior high school boy friend greeted me at fb, unexpectedly
the one who was not so close to me, we were in a different class though
n' know we've been chatting at msn since yesterday
thx God!!!

my oh my...
i'm speechless to the core
hoping the best to come!!!

p.s: thx so much to Yunita n' Stella for the enthusiasm words... laff ya!!!

>Coeur cassé

>
it has nothing to do with boys, really
it's related to my mid term test score (Enzimology)
but most, is because of the issue that i just knew, few hours ago
(sorry it's too personal, can't post it)
it has to do with family thingy
get well soon, heart!!!
i know it will take time, a long one...

soundtrack of the day: I Hate This Part by PCD, Break Even by The Script